Welcome to Gymtime Stories: Part XI of a CCXIII part series.

Part XI: The Germaphobe

If cleanliness is next to godliness, then the gym is pretty much hell.

The gym is filled with sweat, germs, and all sorts of smells unidentifiable yet repulsive. In other words, when you enter a public gym, you are entering a world which is not clean.

But we all know this. I mean what else can you expect? People go to a gym, work out, sweat, and leave. And typically many people do this throughout the day. Even though at the end of the day cleaning people come in to dust around the place, it is not like there are valets ushering around mops and buckets during the day. The gym ain’t Disneyland.

So it is up to us, the gym goer, to wipe down the seats and machines once done. It is up to us to keep the place relatively undisgusting for the good of the whole.

And for the most part, we all do our part. Sometimes there are a few crumb-bums who drip all over benches and mats and such. But again, we all signed up for this.

However, there are some who think of themselves above all of this.

These people, or the germaphobes, are always wiping down equipment. Even if they see someone else wipe it down prior. Even if no one has been on the machine at all. Even if there is not one mote of dust on it. These people take out their towel, their disinfectant, and spray/wipe all over the place before straddling their haunches over the exercise gear.

You may think that I should not mind this; I mean to each their own right? Who cares if they as ODC as Adrian Monk? But I do care.

Let’s think about this for a bit; you work out on a machine. You are not sweaty, but you wipe down and disinfect your area once done as a matter of good manners. Then right after you, some fragile high-minded assface waddles over to wipe down the very same area you whence did. Is not that a bit insulting?

Essentially this person is implying that you are a disgusting pig that has a body so revolting, that the remnants of you need a twice wipe-down before their highness can mount the apparatus. What an assface!

If you are a germaphobe, fine. I don’t care. But you know where you DON’T belong? At a public gym. Because no matter how many cleaning supplies you bring to your ‘workout’, you will never scrub off the bacteria that has been percolating in the upholstery for months.

So please, just accept the fact that the gym is dirty, you cannot clean it, and stop insulting us with your insinuations.